Hey Mom
Don't worry, I'm safe
Sleeping good, eating well
Met someone nice, for once
I still buy the red envelopes
Still write my name in cursive
Still tell you I'm working nights
At some warehouse
In a town
you've never been to.
You still send that peppermint lotion I never use
I rub it on the bruises anyway
smells like trying
I know you did your best
One job, no help, three therapists
You didn't know how I'd splinter
Didn't see how quiet became teeth
But I don't blame you
I remember you crying behind the bathroom door
How your hugs were always warm
The smell of cheap cigarettes
and cold coffee
You always said the world was too cruel
For someone like me
You were wrong
It's perfect
They don't know me like you do, Mom
They never saw the school portraits
The way I made you laugh
When the turkey caught fire
I still send money
Still say love you
Still pretend
Protected you from all of it
Anyway, hope you're warm.
I heard it's snowing back home
Merry Christmas
Mom